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Ever since I can remember I have hated… HATED the sound of chewing and the sound of people writing with pencils. I always assumed it was just me, but about a year ago I looked it up and it had a name. For the past 4 years it has spread to other things such as my mother’s jewelry touching the table, the sound of ice in a cup, the sound of typing on a computer, the sound of distant whispers, pens clicking, and etc. My parents have never been patient with my misophonia and have always told me to “suck it up” or “deal with it.” I understand that it is my issue and not the person making the noise, but it does hurt my feelings when I hear stuff like “this is your fault” and “your so dramatic.” Dinner is excruciatingly painful for me and I just bottle it all up and I just get so angry and I feel like I want to pull my hair out and flip the table over. I do admit, it’s not them, however, I do take it out on them most of the time and I know I shouldn’t. Lately, it has been ruining my relationships with my parents and my little brother and I just need more coping methods. I’ll be in the car and my brother will be eating cheerios and I’ll just burst out crying because I can’t take it anymore. I’ve tried everything- background noise, therapy, breathing techniques, earphones- nothing seems to work. I feel so helpless and I don’t want this to ruin my life but it seems as though my parents don’t understand it at all and I want to show them that I can get better.
