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I can’t cope with my family chewing and breathing. I have to sit at the kitchen table with my parents for dinner every day, and I keep yelling at them to stop being so loud. My mom recently told me to suck it up and to stop telling them to stop breathing and eating so loudly. I told her then I have to eat in a separate room, to which she replied with a flat, “no.”
I can’t handle it anymore and I don’t know what to do. I can’t listen to music or white noise, and my parents can’t stop being loud. What should I do?Olivia
I get this too. When my family eat i can’t even look at them i do get to leave the table but they don’t understand how much it affects me and when i snap at them they get mad and talk with food in their mouth which i can’t stand! i suggest talk to them? show them this website and they might understand more possibly?
Hope this helps!!CJ
You could pull funny faces at them when they are doing it, or do the same but more obvious, or maybe pretend you are going to be sick and rush off to the bathroom doing the sound effects. This might make them come round to your way of thinking of eating separately.John
It’s so hard with parents, because they can take it so personally. When I lived at home, I also had to eat at the table with the family, and also could not even look at my dad eating, he was so loud and so vigorous and so oblivious. It really affected our relationship, and was one of many factors that drove us apart over time.
Now, I’m lucky to have an understanding partner. When I first talked to her about this, I explained to her that I have this problem, where things that are perfectly normal and reasonable trigger unreasonable irritation and anger in me. And I explained that she is doing nothing wrong, and I would react the same way to anyone or anything making the noise. I don’t know if my explanation was good, or if she’s just super understanding, but it worked well for us. I basically live with earplugs all the time at home. Sometimes if we’re eating together and I feel triggered, I’ll quietly get up and go put in earplugs in another room and then come back. It makes her feel a bit self-conscious sometimes, but we talk about that too.
Earplugs overall have been a huge help. Instead of seething over neighbours footsteps or TVs, I just cut it all out and wear earplugs. I can still hear well enough to talk or watch TV, but the background noise is gone. I know not everyone is comfortable with earplugs, though.Simi
Gosh, it’s horrible when people don’t get it! When my family didn’t understand, would make fun, or ignore my requests to stop doing something, I’d describe what I feel as physical pain. People usually don’t want to put you through that, and can understand it better than “sounds bother me”.
I agree with the previous post about asking your parents to have a look at some misophonia websites.
I am 42 now. As a child I would have to excuse myself to the bathroom to avoid the dinner table with my family.
Still to this day I struggle to be comfortable around eating. It’s terrible that a parent would allow their child to become distressed over this and not allow them to leave the situation.