Hi, Thank you for letting me have a safe place to talk about my sound sensitivity issues. One of my biggest triggers is bass coming from car stereos. There is no music to speak of its just boom boom boom that low IQ people enjoy at the expense of the entire community. It seems to be a selling point for all new cars too. I end up so angry after just a few seconds of listening to this junk that I have to meditate internally before I can either walk away or ask as nice as possible for whomever to please lower the volume. Usually I have to extricate myself from the situation in order not to start a scene. Unfortunately for me it’s any loud unexpected noise, slamming of a door, car alarm, people screaming, babies crying, care engine revving, the list is to long to list. Some day’s I cannot leave home I am so sensitive. I have tried dozens of remedies with zero relief so far. I would listen to anyone’s tips for coping.
Bass / any ‘deep’ sounds. Thumping (ie kids upstairs jumping for hours on end). Dogs barking ( Dog next door is LOUD and it is small so it is very high pitched, and owners let it bark. Some days it barks about once every ten minutes, all day….)
And I cannot cancel it out with music / noise because it is too low / High pitched to be masked by other sounds.
People putting down pens on desks. I’ve started to notice this and sounds like people are slamming down pens and gets quite annoying. I’ll mention it by making a joke out of it somehow to try get them to stop but inside I’m raging.
I just recently found out I have Misophonia (Sound sensitivity syndrome). My issue specifically is when people breathe loud and exhale loudly or even a loud sigh. I also hate when children cry loudly and when people eat loudly e.g., smack on their food and eat with their mouth open and after they drink something, they exhale loudly like, “Ahhhhh.” I always knew I had a sound sensitivity issue but never knew there was a name for it, let alone, finding out it is a psychological injury.
Mine is the sounds of humans rather than specific objects or body parts (is this still misophonia?) –
Humans banging on walls, floors, doors, banging on fences/DIY banging/drilling etc,
Humans talking at me relentlessly or at someone with me relentlessly and excessively,
Humans walking loudly/stomping around,
Humans banging drawers, washing machines, playing loud music through walls,
Humans hoovering and banging the floor with the hoover,
Humans beeping their horns,
Humans talking outside my window loudly,
Humans shouting at each other,
Humans talking loudly in coffee shops, shops and restaurants,
Humans talking constantly at work.
I’m saying humans because if animals did the same I’d love it! For some reason it’s just humans and their loud banging noises that I feel are being forced on me against my will, that I’m trapped and can’t get away from it or stop it. It makes me feel angry that they can subject me and my loved ones to torture from their sounds. I can honestly say it’s ruined my life, sounds dramatic but sadly very true.
One of the banging noises is from my partner – it’s the only one thing he does that triggers me – he drops his metal vape on the floor. This is an accident but can happen two to three times a day, and he’s had the thing for about two years! When it drops it make a big bang as its chunky and metal and I get such a rage/fight or flight response. I threaten to fill the sink with water and throw it in. I’ve convinced him to buy a different shaped vape now and this has actually stopped him dropping it and it makes me so happy that I don’t treat him in this awful way anymore.
I feel like such a freak for hating people for existing and living their lives, they’re just healthy, happy, normal people, but these everyday things people do are torture for me.
My trigger noises:
1. Dog smacking mouth and licking lips or any part of his body.
2. Gum chewing and gum popping.
3. Food chewing noises, even my own. I especially hate the sound of someone biting into or munching on an apple.
4. Pen clicking.
5. Snapping noises.
6. Watch ticking.
7. Kids screaming.
8. Fingernail and toenail clipping.
9. Loud sneezing.
10. Gulping or swallowing sounds.
I have to wear earplugs to bed a lot of nights because of my dog smacking his mouth. If I hear food chewing noises, I have to leave the room. Once I hear the ticking of a watch or clock, the noise amplifies and makes me feel like I am losing my mind. I hate people clicking their pens or any noise that snaps, clicks or pops repetitively.
My triggers have evolved with my changing circumstances over the decades.
Initially, it was my father’s mouth sucking sound, like he was sucking food out of his teeth. I was eleven and trapped with my folks on a camping trip. (Decades later I confirmed with my mother that that year was a particularly bad one for my father at work, and may have caused some anxiety-related behavior. It sure started me down that road.) Strangely, he only did it during that trip.
Soon afterward, becoming overly sensitized to sounds, the next triggers were my father’s scraping the plate to get every bit – and I mean like he was digging for gold. And my mother loading/unloading the dishwasher – she clanged the dishes together so loudly I couldn’t believe they didn’t break.
Later, it was my mother’s exaggerated hissing saying words starting with “s.” Someone called this “sibilance.” (Let me mention I always made my discomfort to these triggers known, and received nothing but contempt or warnings.) To my horror, she eventually started deliberately exaggerating the sound and its duration, even repeating the word over and over, and smiled at me when she did it. This is the only intentional trigger-causing I knew of, but it caused a permanent rift in our relationship. (Never really developed a good relationship with my father.)
The things that trigger me now are the obnoxious, unnecessary, thoughtless things people do repeatedly, and their associated noises: blowing the horn to lock the car door; fidgeting with a hard plastic thing and dropping it on the desk every 30 seconds, day after day; the loud, grating voice of the woman who runs her mouth most of the work day about personal or gossipy subjects.
So, my triggers seem to have begun during a period of (someone else’s) anxiety, and grew more intense upon the realization that I was an object of contempt or at least apathy. I was incredibly miserable until I grew up and moved out. Then I was a little less so, because I had more freedom. But people were still assholes, and that, essentially, is what angers me.
I thought there was something uniquely wrong with me for 50 years. I’m relieved but also very sorry to see I’m not alone in this. Living in the right kind of place and doing things you love will make a difference. Can’t really do that at work, but that won’t last forever.
I have some trigger sounds, and sometimes a new one gets added to the list. As with other people I see on here, I have certain “keyers” who are close to me, who also do the most triggers.
– Keyer #1 clearing throat
– Keyer #2 speaking from another room (I can hear through the wall, and the deep vibrations are what gets me)
– Keyer #2 coughing after eating (not regular coughing)
– Keyer #3 clearing throat
– #3 “inhaling phlegm” (it sounds weird but it is something that I do as well)
– #3 scraping thumb with opposite thumbnail
– #3 tongue-clicking sound that she makes while speaking
– #3 using a toothpick
– Anyone snoring
– Anyone making lip and tongue sound (I can’t describe it so well)
Bonus: sights and feelings:
– Wadded up paper towel/napkin
– Wet paper
– Little shred of paper towel/napkin
– Denim/similar textures (there are placemats at my aunt’s house that I really don’t like to touch, in fact, I don’t even want to set my cup on the mat because of sympathy for the cup)
I am 13 years old and I started noticing these sounds at the beginning of lockdown. Now that I think about it, however, I can remember a trigger sound from back in 3rd grade.
For me my top sound that makes me feel crazily agitated is the sound of heels clicking on concrete or in the supermarket etc . Makes me want to get really angry. Next on my my list is the sound of a keyboard or the super annoying keyboard clicks on Facebook. I just want to scream when I hear those.
Snoring obviously, sets me off.
A dog licking itself. Aaaggh!!!
And weirdly, although I’m a musician I can’t cope with music being played suddenly. Such a a a neighbour playing music.
A car or motor idling outside drives me nuts!!!!