Reply To: My misophonia is getting worse as I get older

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#1014809
Someone

Hi. I read all the messages on the board, and it feels so good that someone understands. I’m a fourteen year old living in a family of five and it gets horrible at times to the point of where it cause me to go into a panic attack. Their breathing, the clicking their tongue makes, how there mouth clicks when they just ate, drinking water, chewing, basically any mouth noise along with static. I I also can’t look at peoples’ mouthes when they eat or it gets me triggered. My mom understands sometimes because she has it too, but I honestly feel like I got it really bad. It’s caused me to panic in class and stay in the bathrooms during lunches, cry and breakdown, and leave and sit in a different room whenever I see someone pull out food. My brothers don’t understand it when I say can you chew with your mouth closed and they say I can’t help it and chew louder. It’s gotten really bad over the years, it started around 12 I think and I’m almost 15, and it causes me to do these cringes with my neck when I hear the noise or kick my leg involvontariy but it stops once my panic goes down and I don’t hear the noise anymore. I hate this and it’s ruining my relationships, expectially my mom because she understands it but you can still see she hurts when I go and sit at the table when she starts eating, and it hurts really bad, but I can’t go over there cause I don’t want to cause a scene. I feel like it would hurt my parents feelings, my dad is my main trigger and try’s to sit away for me, if I asked to get earplugs or noise cancelling head phones because I know my mom is dealing with hers fine, I feel like a baby if I ask because of that. They both know I have it but they don’t know how worse it’s gotten, I have so much anxiety thinking about it all. I know it’s gotten and most likely is going to get worse, but I don’t know what to do and don’t want to ask and offend them. I know it’s not as bad as your guys, but if you have any advice from experiencing it longer, I would greatly appreciate it.